Downgraded to Orange or even Green

I have been trying to go to bed at 9:30 or even 9:00 lately, but have been failing miserably the past few nights. For one thing, TheLimey has been out of town, which makes it much easier to put off going to bed "just for a little while" (repeatedly) until I suddenly realize it's 11:30 or even 12:00. That's icky when I'm getting up at 5:45.

Last night took the proverbial cake, though, as I didn't drag my behind into the sack until 2:10. This was because I had begun the small and innocuous project of listing the names of the 184 students who had participated in my study so that I could inform their respective professors that they did the extra credit work.

What I discovered was that there were 14 more names overall on the sign-up sheets than there were completed surveys. This meant that either 14 people had signed up for extra credit who did not actually do a survey, or else that 14 very confidential surveys (with names on) had gone missing. Both meant something pretty bad, especially that second one. So I spent the night going over all the surveys and the ID sheets and cross-referencing who was there on what day and who was their professor and so forth.

(In a completely unrelated snafu, one student apparently decided that if she could get extra credit for doing the study, then she could get three times the extra credit for doing the study three times. Of course the second and third forms are spoiled and unusable data, and it's highly unlikely her prof is going to give her three times the E.C., so she basically wasted two hours and possibly also travel time.)

But once I'd accounted for all that, I still had 14 missing surveys. I desperately hoped they were simply still in my office at the department somehow. But this morning when I came in, there really were no more completed forms.

But--in a desk drawer there was a stack of the sign-in sheets I had used for my previous study two years ago for my thesis. And I remembered that when we had so many more participants this time than I anticipated, I had grabbed a couple of the old, 2003 blank sign-in sheets to use because we were short. So after combing through my current sign-in sheets and the database, I finally determined that nearly all the students' names associated with "missing" surveys were on one particular sign-up sheet of the old format.

Bingo!

I had grabbed one already filled-out form from 2003 with the blank ones, and it had gotten mixed up with the newly filled-out sign-in forms from this year. The few names that were not on that sheet? PEBKAC. When I went through the stack again, they were there after all. (My accuracy suffers considerably after 10:00 or 11:00 pm.)

Whew!

The Artist Formerly Known as Anonymous

Hey look! A reply. Now we know it's Andy Pierson.

(The things we become famous for.)


I wonder how many other posts end up with replies on them that I don't see until months later, or never? That's one of the things I like about Flick'r: its "new comments" function.

Wordsurdity!

More nonword fun*.

From Surface: "unequivocably" [unequivocally]

From a book-on-tape I've been listening to in the car: "dialated" [dilated] and of course my all-time favorite/peevy mispronunciation: "relator" [realtor]. (It's as bad as "athalete" [athlete]!)


*And thanks to Liddy for the addition of good old "fermiliar" [familiar] and ..."statisticky"! [comes with standard deviations, cinnamon sugar & melted butter?]

In Prep for Monday

We're back to Commie-bashing! Only for some reason the popular term lately seems to be "Marxist"; at least, that's what I was called.

And, yikes. What more can I say? It's even worse than I thought.

Happy Columbus Day.

"Poxford"

I did a little more digging yesterday about the Fabulous Conference Opportunity of the Oxford Round Table. Or Roundtable*. I still felt a bit suspicious, partly because of the fee, and partly because of the how-the-heck-did-they-find-me? aspect. It reminded me in flavor just a bit too much of those vanity press mailers that promise to publish your wonderful poetry--for a $300 fee. Was this a "vanity conference"? True, there were shining press releases about those who had attended, but in a way this added to that flavor. (Press releases of cognitive dissonance, perhaps?)

I found the name of someone at a nearby university who had attended one of the conferences, and I emailed them to ask how it had been. I also emailed a former prof of mine who had attended undergrad at Oxford.

The person who had attended replied, in part:

Hosting roundtables is one of the ways that Oxford generates revenue during the summer, ... Overall it was fun and educational and I met a lot of very interesting people, but that the quality of the presentations varied greatly. ... I had discretionary funding for the trip, but if one had to pay for their own ticket and registration there are probably better academic conferences to invest in.

And my former prof who'd been to Oxford replied, more definitively yet humorously crushing my hopes of international research renown:

OK, as for the Poxford thing...it’s a fake conference. The sort of thing that’s equivalent to those e-mails telling you you’ve won the lotto in Nigeria...It’s not under the auspices of the university proper, merely using Oxford facilities on a conference rental basis, and if you go to the website you’ll see that registration is around $3000. Someone is making a mint, and everyone with a chequebook is invited. Don’t bother.

So, yes. Vanity conference. It's real, in that it exists and people attend, but ... it's not exactly the bastion of exclusivity they make it out to be. I've put away the "chequebook".

(But if my department paid for it, I would still totally go. After all, I'd still get to present my research to a bunch of strangers in various fields, while taking a vacation in Oxford! And TheLimey wants to have a pint on the old stomping grounds of C.S. Lewis and Tolkien, so I'm sure he'd find a way to accompany me. As I said before, I can fantasize, can't I?)


*I want to make sure that I include the search terms future invitees will be searching with when they are looking for nonexistent information about this event. 'Cause I sure didn't find any like this.

Curiouser and Curiouser

I just received an invitation to this supposedly prestigious conference, specifically their March Round Table regarding Diversity in Society.

At first I thought it was a scam. They only pick 35 people from around the world for each conference, and supposedly after a "significant screening process". So, why would they choose me, still an academic nobody? But if you Google the phrase, and look at the articles written about those who've attended, it does seem pretty, well...prestigious. Maybe they want a few up-and-coming-nobodies. (Am I up-and-coming?) Or maybe it was a mistake!

The part that seems pretty real is that it costs $3000 (plus airfare) to attend.

I've written my department head about this to ask if there's any way he can think of to find funds. I am not optimistic, because just this summer I was in a meeting with him where we discussed the huge and massive cuts to the department funding, so much so that we now have individual counters to keep track of our paper usage in the copy room.

But anyway. I can fantasize about it, can't I?


* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

UPDATE:

Well, it looks like it's for real, at any rate. However, since there is more than one per year, I don't know how exclusive it really can be considered. Nevertheless, here's a description of their selection process:

"The screening process to identify presenters and attendees engaged
by the Oxford Round Table Program Committee is highly selective and
discriminatory: by nomination and recommendations of previous Round Table
participants and the Round Table directors, from recognized presentations and
awards of state and national organizations, or by invitations to an individual
in a successful organizations, university or school district."

They say the process is kept secret to avoid politicization.

It must be a previous participant. How else would anyone out in the world know what I'm even working on? (And they did invite me to present, not just attend.)

Some fringe websites describe this whole event as the "breeding ground for the Illuminati". (Ah, if only it were so espionage-worthy.)

That time of year

Once again, time to bring out the old Fightin' Whities shirt .

I seem to remember that Argot wore hers when she came for the wedding...

Incoming!

September was bulging with days wherein I worked 15 hours, and when I had a moment to catch my breath often spent it sleeping. Have collected most of my data, but think I have about 30 more participants to find somewhere. Hopefully this will be acceptable as far as the situation for which I needed to have my data collected by September.

A lot of my time goes towards class prep. I suspect some people imagine that college instructors are overpaid* as they only "work" a few hours a week, i.e. when the class is actually in session. This is logically akin to saying that a homemaker doesn't "work". In some ways the class prep is easier than being a student, but mainly in the sense that I will not be given a test on it in the near future, and can decide what the material will consist of. In all other ways, it's about five times as much work as (I seem to remember) being the student in the class was. Presumably, teaching the same class twice makes it easier, because then you already have the class and the lectures assembled.

I am trying to keep my students awake for the research methods section of Personality, but some parts of the text are boring and overly redundant even for me. I have therefore asked them to come up with topics in Personality that they want to know about, and we have begun having informal discussions about them in the second half of class. I think I will continue that.

The Women's Psych class is different. And kind of scary. I have started out by discussing external factors in women's lives, i.e. society's influence on women. I first shocked many of them by putting up an overhead copied from the CDC (Center for Disease Control) website that shows homicide being among the top killers of women in several age groups (teens through forties, basically, at which point disease begins killing us faster than humans.) Also showed them that a top killer of pregnant women is--you guessed it--homicide. Asked what they thought the top workplace killers of women might be? Yep, homicide's right in there. Now it's unfortunate, but usually the killers are male (ex-) partners. Note that this is not interpretation, or a twist of stats, but simply collected data.

Okay. So. I asked them in an assignment to speculate (speculate!) how this circumstance might affect women's mental health. Pretty simple, right? I was not surprised that many of the students said "likely to increase depression, anxiety, etc.". In fact I speculate that, myself. I was a little surprised that a few of them said essentially "It doesn't affect them because they don't know about it."

The annoying thing about this particular subset of answers is that they are from the few male students in the class. I know they didn't all get together and decide on this answer, but individually, spontaneously decided it. It's amazing. (There is also further activity along this line that feels scary and threatening, but I don't want to go deeper into it online.) It's like they think I'm saying this stuff to be mean to them personally. For Pete's sake, I'm not making it up! I got my material from the Justice Department, and the CDC! And it clearly has an effect on women, which is what the class is about.

On the other hand, I have lots of students coming up at the break or after class to tell me in amazement or sorrow that I have been talking about their own lives, so my material must not be too off course. (These students have so far been entirely women.)

Now, off to write that Personality lecture for today...


*Except, of course, graduate students who double as instructors.

Starving the Mini-Pandas

Last night I had another one of those dreams I've had throughout my life wherein I can't take care of all of my pets. (I don't even have any pets!) But this one was much bigger in scope than ever before.

I dreamed that I found a cage of pet rats in some unexplored area of my home, and realized they I had simply forgotten I had them. Meanwhile, they had been having babies, starving, growing filthy, and etc. as creatures do who are in captivity and neglected.

Then just as I was trying to figure out how I was going to get them all out and into new homes and clean and feed them, I realized that the room was bigger than I thought, and crammed with shelves and shelves of various really cool animals in terrible neglect. Exotic fish were gasping and floating in scummy half-evaporated tanks, other animals in cages were lying about listlessly in starvation. There was in particular a small glass tank that had several mini-pandas in it (about the size of kittens), and they had outgrown their little white plastic collars and filled the little tank almost completely, so I had to break it to get them out.

I couldn't believe I had been given so many different cool animals, and I also couldn't believe I had so completely forgotten about them! It was terrible.

This particular dream always seems to be about my guilt in not being able to take care of all my various tasks. And I have in fact been feeling even more behind in more different areas than usual lately.

So, just wash your hands, I guess...

Just in time for cold and flu season--this just in:

Echinacea trials*

Vitamin C trials**

But I'll probably still use my Emergen-C packets, which product I claim accounts for my never getting colds (though I didn't really get them before, either) and my staying awake during most of grad school. And I'll probably still use echinacea as part of my multifarious UTI treatment. (I know that's a misuse. I just like saying multifarious, and rarely get a chance to do so.)

*(Mirror article)
**(Mirror article)

Mad Lib

The massive Mad Lib this week was an article from NPR’s website:
('Sweeping Beauty' Cleans Up With Poetry by Susan Stamberg)

--a story about a new book of poetry about housework.

The template was as follows:

[1.Noun] is a chore for many, and a pleasure for some.
[2.Occupation] [3.A virtue] Shearin's [4.relative] sees it as the
former.
"My [4.relative] [5.verb]s what can never [6.adverb] be [7.past-tense
verb]," Shearin writes in the book [8.Verb]ing Beauty. "So she does
not care for [9.verb]ing or [10.verb]ing."
Love it or loathe it, domestic [11.noun] is a [12.adjective] experience
and it's celebrated in [8.Verb]ing Beauty -- [13.Adjective] Women
Poets Do [14.Activity].
The punch of [15.noun], the [16.A sound] of wars at the [17.meal]
table, the shroud of a bed sheet; editor and [18.adjective]
[19.occupation] [20.Name] says [21.category of people]'s poems of
[22.noun] are peppered with [23.adjective] realities.
And yet, for many of these baby boomer [24.occupation]s, there is
[25.noun] in housework.

Your more interesting answers were:

Tim:

Nugget is a chore for many, and a pleasure for some. Quantum Mechanic Wisdom Shearin's great-nephew sees it as the former.
"My great-nephew smacks what can never sharply be cart-wheeled," Shearin writes in the book Biting Beauty. "So she does not care for slapping or kicking."
Love it or loathe it, domestic dingo is a cold experience and it's celebrated in Biting Beauty -- Squishy Women Poets Do Mulching.
The punch of pylon, the flam of wars at the Mango Chicken table, the shroud of a bed sheet; editor and wispy pet embalmer Floyd P. McDuffin says the simple-minded's poems of robots are peppered with mad realities.
And yet, for many of these baby boomer parole violators, there is Tupperware in housework.

Liddy:

Weed whacker is a chore for many, and a pleasure for some. King of Sweden Self-Control Shearin's hillbilly cousin sees it as the former.
"My hillbilly cousin guesses what can never doggedly be flown," Shearin writes in the book Pushing Beauty. "So she does not care for swaying or rocking out."
Love it or loathe it, domestic toothbrush is a flashy experience and it's celebrated in Pushing Beauty -- Reptilian Women Poets Do Playing with Clay.
The punch of glowworm, the hum of wars at the brunch table, the shroud of a bed sheet; editor and dressy Last Man Standing Georgette says freshmen's poems of juniper berry are peppered with fresh realities.
And yet, for many of these baby boomer whores, there is newspaper in housework.

Another Liz (as opposed to me!):

Pompom is a chore for many, and a pleasure for some. Professional cheerleader Honesty Shearin's second cousin, twice removed, sees it as the former.
"My second cousin, twice removed, tumbles what can never nimbly be fallen," Shearin writes in the book Chewing Beauty. "So she does not care for blowing or gnawing."
Love it or loathe it, domestic cheek is a nippy experience and it's celebrated in Chewing Beauty -- Scarlet Women Poets Do High School Football Games.
The punch of sweater vests, the rah! of wars at the brunch table, the shroud of a bed sheet; editor and grungy gym teacher Buffy says jocks' poems of bullhorn are peppered with glum realities.
And yet, for many of these baby boomer vampire slayers, there is tree in housework.

More Jive

So, wait a minute, Mr. Brown. I thought that your party was determinedly against playing the Blame Game. Or does that only apply when blame is coming from elsewhere toward you? Now that you've been abandoned, does it seem so evenhanded?

I think it really just translates into "Yeah, I'm gonna neeed you to go ahead and hold off on that blame until we have a decent defense/scapegoat set up. [Then we get to be the ones to take that first shot.]"

Autumn Foodies

Every autumn (the first cold front in September, usually) I am overtaken with the urge to be domestic, cook things, and in general become very nesty. (I told TheLimey this last year when we were just dating and he became quite concerned, as he thought I said "nasty". )

Last weekend I must then perforce take a cooking break from my academic slaving. I made a number of things to be parceled out into the freezer for eating this week.

I am most proud of two recipes that I synthesized myself. I say "synthesized" advisedly, because I did actually scan (not "skim") hundreds of recipes for these items, note common elements, select those I approved of, and put them together to make my recipes. And they turned out really, really good. (Links are in pdf form, scanned from my actual recipe cards.)

First, the bean soup. Vegetarians can substitute veggie or mushroom stock, and substitute some smoky seitan product for the hambits. But there should definitely be something with that smoky flavor. This is a really rich and buttery-tasting soup (though there's no butter in it). You will always want a second bowl, even if you don't realize it when you first begin eating.

I use Jennie-O turkey ham for the ham. I use Mrs. Dash extra-spicy for the spicy seasoning. And I've more or less converted to that Better-Than-Bouillon stuff for all my bouillon needs, though at the time I developed this I was still using granules. Do not omit the sherry! There's something about onions and sherry that makes food taste like restaurant food. I use Sheffield extra-dry. (Don't use a cream sherry, of course, like Bristol Cream or something. Save that for drinking with the roasted chestnuts.)

Next, the meatloaf*. While I have not traditionally been a big meatloaf person, TheLimey mentioned that he really liked meatloaf, so I began the recipe synthesis at that time. I have certainly tasted some really ucky meatloaves in my time, so I had to be sure. I do like this one a lot and have been known to take seconds. (Don't think this is easily convertible to vegetarian, and it involves a gross description of meat, so don't look!)

I use ground chuck, and I use "heavy" whole wheat (not that fluffy stuff) for the bread. (Usually I use Brownberry Natural Health Nut.) Near the end of the cooking process, I use a turkey baster to repeatedly suck up the drippings, with which I make gravy, and serve the lot with chunky mashed potatoes. If someone knows how to get the chewy, semi-crispy, caramelized bottom (like that on Boston Market meatloaf) I'd be much obliged if you told me. I'm wondering if it might have to involve a second stovetop process after the baking...

Anyway, enjoy, and remember to attribute the recipes to me!! :)

*The meatloaf even has beer in it. That's pretty special, if you ask me.

With Apologies to Geistweg...

As for some reason Tim has been unable to do the Mad Lib[Libs?] this week, I found myself compelled to do one. I couldn't leave a gap like that.

So here it is---have at it!

1. noun
2. occupation
3. a virtue
4. relative
5. verb
6. adverb
7. past-tense verb
8. verb
9. verb
10. verb
11. noun
12. adjective
13. adjective
14. activity
15. noun
16. a sound
17. meal
18. adjective
19. occupation
20. person's name
21. category of people
22. noun
23. adjective
24. occupation
25. noun

Finally, The Truth

Lately the McDonald's in Smalltown USA (where I now live) has sported a sign out front touting its McBratwurst, brought back apparently in time for McOktoberfest. "Brats are back!" it proclaims.

This morning when I drove past, I was gratified to see that some wag had removed the initial "b" so it now reads "Rats are back!"

I keep thinking of it and chortling to myself, appearing even more loony than usual as I walk around campus.

I'll try to get a picture if it stays up long enough.

Heh. Rats.

The Country of Lovely

You can become a citizen, too...

(Thanks to this bloke.)

Junk Mail

I saw this idea proposed first by Andy Rooney a few years ago, but this guy has certainly upped the stakes considerably.

Now, if only there was some way to do it for the online spammers, too.

All the Live-Long Week

This week I have been leaving home at approximately 7am and returning approximately at 9pm (or in some cases coming home at 8 and then just working until 10). Counting hours worked Sunday, this will mean approximately 66 hours worked this week by tonight. Well, I guess that includes commuting hours, which add up to about 1.5 hours per day, but are technically not actually working.

I am becoming braindead and having increasing trouble having any rational thoughts, let alone thoughts that are worth standing in front of a classroom and relating to others.

Equinox

Another of my favorite times of year. And this one comes twice annually!

I enjoy that odd limnal quality of the light and the air. It always smells like woodsmoke, whether it's spring or autumn.

In The Year 2045...

Us Old
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

I couldn't resist trying out the age and sex morpher that Argot was using.

http://www.ifonlylifewasaspredictable.co.uk/

It was also fun switching our sexes, so I looked butch (sort of) and TheLimey looked femme (sort of...okay, not really).

But what was really fun was doing the opposite: putting in my own picture and making me more femme, and his more butch.

Heh.

* * * * * *

Later: here's another one that does additional morphs to those shown above.

News of Today

In a hurry, so:

Moon landing!! !!

$ $??

All Work and Some Play

Have been working insanely lately (as opposed to all those other activities I normally do insanely.) Two brand spankin' new classes = lots and lots of class prep. Also clinical work, of course. And have been doing lots of maneuvering to get instructors to recruit their students as participants for my prejudice study.

Last time I collected data, I had a hard time getting 5,6...maybe 10 or 15 people to one data session (i.e. sitting down to fill out a form at a pre-arranged time). I needed a total n of 100-something, and it took several months to get that. So imagine my shock when I was tallying up the sign-up sheets from this week and found that I have over 300 participants already, in clumps of 45 and 75! Furthermore, this only includes students from the Psychology Department--we've also solicited instructors from a couple other departments.

This means that the puny rooms I reserved for next week are going to be way too small. I had to run over to the library and reserve their goshdang auditorium. It wasn't even available at all the data collection times, which means my poor assistants may be administering the survey not only in a couple classrooms but also out in the hall. I have got to get them some help, too, as I will be off doing therapy at those times (Hence the need for assistants in the first place.)

In other news, last weekend TheLimey and I briefly stopped working at about 8pm on Saturday in order to attend Astronomy on the Beach, where we got to see the actual surface of the moon practically close enough to touch, and also several different views of the ring nebula. We even bought ice creams to eat in the dark (a rocket for TheLimey, and a Choco Taco for me). It's also possible that the binocular case we brought may have actually been a wine case with a nice red and some plastic glasses in it.

For me the astronomical high point came after overhearing a group of men discussing the potential visibility of the space station that evening. ("You ask them about it--you're a guy!" I whispered in a completely spurious argument that worked like a charm.) One of the men had a printout, on which he looked up the time--it was only minutes away--and location in the sky. So we all peered intently at the bottom of the big dipper, ("Where is it? Do you see it? It's supposed to be right under there...") Sure enough, a little moving star appeared there as I stared. "I see it!" I exclaimed in triumph, as, for no apparent reason, I was the first to detect it. I felt like I won some kind of astronomer contest.

The space station star disappeared halfway across the sky as it entered the shadow of the earth.

Weird Fish

Weird Fish
Originally uploaded by English Invader.

Okay you reference types--real sea creature or photoshopped tadpole?

I honestly don't know. And every time I make up my mind, I feel like a doofus no matter which thing I think.

???

Tangents

Looking to see who else on Blogger professes an interest in Marmite leads to blogs like this. Absolutely no reason why that should have been a surprise to me.

I always look at this profile and wish that good ol' Bunty would actually have a blog. I just know it would be ree-diculous.

Dangit...

Well, this sure sucks for me. Or for us, I guess.

A Good Day...

..oops, had a post but am using the truly ancient computer in my office, which now has internet. When I tried to italicize a word, it deleted all the words I had written instead.
However, I still have a parking space and a paycheck today. Although I had to set the alarm for 5:30 to do one, and had to wait an extra week for the other.

Piled Higher & Deeper

Now that the semester has begun again, I have returned to that state wherein every single hour from get-up to lie-down is scheduled with something I desperately have to be doing.

I am prepping and teaching two new classes, working at the student clinic (and also somewhat at another clinic), and have just received approval to collect my data--which has to be collected by the end of the month, for reasons I can't discuss right now. Note that it is already September 12th. This is going to be a colossal effort. I have two assistants, bless them, and will be trying to recruit some more in my classes this week. I can't imagine that we will really be able to get 210 participants recruited and their data collected in two weeks. My advisor is now bugging me about why my database isn't already set up. "I'm a human being, not a machine"!!

I now commute to campus in the mornings. There are a lot of things about commuting that I really hate. Aside from the obvious gas and parking issues, it makes me really dislike people (including myself) by 8:15 am, for one. That's a really bad way to start any day, but particularly a day of teaching and therapy.

What I like about it is the misty fields of grain and small lakes and overripe trees, glazed with that Maxfield Parrish (sp?) kind of sunlight.

Part II-b: Blossoms of Madness Continued

I spent the subsequent 20 minutes hopping mad, and shaking, on and off the phone with UPS. Obviously, Monday redelivery would result in no flowers for my wedding and a $300 box of garbage on our doorstep for the first day of our honeymoon. Isn't the point of "overnight delivery" to have the item delivered, well, overnight?? Not four days later? ("YES! YES! YES! --I madly pressed the button for "request redelivery or pickup"). I eventually got to speak with a carbon unit.

My options were sort of vague in some senses, but iron strict in others. For example, I could request re-delivery after 5pm...but it might or might not occur, based on the whim of the individual deliverer as it was up to him or her. Union regulations. I could arrange to go pick up my item myself ($300 worth of flowers dehydrating in the August heat as we spoke), in a kind of cruddy area that was half an hour's drive away. I could also try to find the delivery [man, as it turned out], on his lunch break in our town at 2:30 at a particular restaurant. That sounded like my best bet. The only problem, of course, was that my cell-phone-free auntie would be arriving at the airport on hour away--also at 2:30.

After a few more calls to and from UPS, it was established that the UPS lunch spot of the day was a different (but still local) restaurant, and that they would be congregating there at 3. (Who knew they had such organization around their breaks?) I also called TheLimey at work, who agreed to cut short his first day back at the home office in weeks in order to pick up aforementioned aunt at the airport. I equipped him with a cardboard sign (they'd never met in person) at his lunch visit home.

As many of my errands were not in our town, I only got to about the part where I deposited clean linens at my old apartment (for out-of-town family members) before I had to return for the UPS rendezvous. This meant that I didn't get all the cake and flower supplies, but I had a chance of getting the precious, precious flowers themselves.

I waited nervously at the appointed restaurant (Wendy's) for a few minutes before a brown-uniformed man walked in. He looked completely nonplussed when I approached him, and then referred me to a different UPS guy who would be there shortly. Presently another UPS guy showed up, with another on his heels. Right: neither was the one I wanted. (I wondered how the heck many UPS expediters could they possibly need in one tiny town like this, and how was it that they all decided to meet at Wendy's for lunch that day?) Finally, another brown van drove up, and I was out there before it even stopped. As I approached, the driver said, "You must be the lady from L__ Street!"

He then informed me that he had already gone back to the house and tried to redeliver the package, and that our neighbors had signed for it. Apparently he is in the habit of having them sign for TheLimey's stuff when he's out of town, anyway. Of course this begged the question: why the heck couldn't he have done that earlier that morning instead of making me completely insane for the entire day?? But I didn't say that. I just went home, spoke with the neighbor, and got my gigantor package of flowers.

A mocking aside...

...as I can't help laughing out loud at this sarky site.

I haven't even seen/listened to the original websites yet.

Wedding Part II: Blossoms of Madness

Friday, there were two things that had to go off smoothly for a lot of other things to also go smoothly. 1: My aunt had to be fetched from the airport, and 2: The flowers (nearly $300 worth) had to be delivered. I also had to run around to the craft store and to various other shops for flower, cake, and toiletry items that I hadn't been able to get yet due to work and moving. (Stupid life, interfering with my wedding!)

I was particularly worried about the flowers, as I knew that the wholesale place from which I had ordered them was sending them UPS. If you know my history at all, you know that I have a loathe/hate relationship with UPS for home deliveries because of their inability to leave anything anywhere without someone (who is invariably at work like a normal human being) signing for it. (If you hear ominous music right now, it's for a reason.)

However, at this point I was staying at TheLimey's, where he had signed a little thing saying UPS could leave shipments at the door, and I had also stressed to the company that I would have to be in and out of the house all day running errands. Therefore it was very important that their shipper leave the flowers at the door. To which they very pleasantly agreed. Just to make sure, I had placed several post-its on the door bearing pleas to leave shipments at the door, signed by me just in case they needed to take a signature with them.

Friday morning I told myself that I was simply going to get ready and go do my errands and then pick up my aunt at the airport, trusting that all my flower-delivery precautions would be fine--probably even unnecessary, and I couldn't wait around at home all day regardless. So I hurriedly dashed through my shower, imagining all the time that UPS was probably at my door right that second with the flowers.

For once in my life, my paranoid imaginings about missing important events while in the shower turned out to be true, as I discovered with a terrible shock when I walked downstairs and saw the delivery note on the back door. "We made our first delivery attempt!" it cried cheerfully. "The next attempt will be MOONNNDAAAYYY." (This last word sounded slowed-down in my mind like a nightmare in a movie.)

(To Be Continued...Someone keeps talking to me, and besides I ought to be working on real work anyway...)

Wedding Part I: The Preparationing

Invitation background
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

The beginning of the wedding saga: a blog too little, too late, and with deplorable timing. But I intend to see it through!

Back in...what was it, February?--when we first decided we ought to get married, I thought I was avoiding a lot of hair-pulling (of the frustrated kind) by having a less fant-see kind of wedding.

I still think this was probably true. However, it turned out to be a heckuva lot of work nevertheless.

If I could have omitted one of my four primary tasks this summer (grad studies, clinical work, moving, wedding planning), it would have seemed manageable. At least that's what I tell myself. Who knows!

Wreckage of Moving
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

The moving was the most onerous of the tasks. For once I had the luxury of having my new place available longer than 45 minutes before my old place needed to be empty, so I decided to avoid the last-minute desperation by moving gradually. Every time we saw each other, I tried to have a load of well-organized boxes ready for transport to TheLimey's place. I still think this was somewhat helpful, but the drawback was that the disorientation of moving lasted for about three months instead of a few days. Try as I might, I could not keep my possessions straight and was forever needing something I had just moved the week before.

Also, since I was expecting an out-of-town guest in July, there was significant move-age that I delayed until after that visit. This meant that August was when I had to do most of it.

Several factors made this the most horrible move I have done in my life:

1. The months-long aspect as described above, 2. Being so busy in general that I had to cram most of the moving into odd hours and days, thus precluding scheduling help from others, 3. The build-up of four years' worth of junk, and 4. the confluence of TheLimey's absence for the two weeks before the wedding with the highest peak of moving & wedding activities & clinical responsibilities combined. Crikey. (Just FYI, today we unloaded the last and final load of my stuff.)

As far as the wedding itself, I had arranged for a few friends to help me out with things such as flower arranging, hairdoing, coordinating, park decorating, and so forth. Thank goodness for all those kind people. I wanted a community/friend/family oriented wedding, and it turns out we both have really great community/friends/family.

Helping Liz
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

The event was on Sunday. I had arranged for the wholesale flowers to be delivered on Friday so that my friends could come over on Saturday morning and help me make them into pretty things. I had also arranged for a local baker to deliver several cakes, not decorated but iced, on Saturday morning so that we could fondant them up, stack them up, and my aunt could decorate them to look more or less like a picture I had found in a bridal magazine (I only had one, I swear--and it was a free one that had been given me!)

Some of our friends who were only attending the reception (i.e. the "fun part") had agreed to show up early and hold our place at the park, as your pavilion could be usurped if you didn't get there by 12, and there were rumors of table-snatching if you didn't get there ridiculously early. We had gotten our license and paperwork ready, I had written out the entire ceremony and sent it to the officiant, and the ceremony musicians (i.e. family members) was mostly in place.

TheLimey was due to return from his business trip on Thursday night, and my aunt was due in on Friday afternoon. So far, everything seemed to be in place, although I had been going mad that week what with moving by myself every minute (so much for avoiding last-minute desperation) that I wasn't at one clinic or another doing all the freakin' assessments that waited until freakin' August to show up.

But it wasn't until Friday that I began to feel that things were tilting slowly but heavily and inexorably out of my control...

Now to interrupt my busy schedule of school preparation, unpacking, complicated secret blogging about the wedding, and thinking really hard about all those wedding thank-yous for everyone who was so incredibly nice to us...

Yesterday I received this email from my supervisor (yet another Lisa) at the student clinic (last names have been removed for confidentiality's sake):

As many of you know, Dean and I moved here after 6 years in Louisiana. We have heard from several friends who've been directly affected by the hurricane. So far, none of the friends have lost anyone. But many are homeless. Here is an email from a friend of ours whose entire family has been displaced. If you have clothing in the sizes needed and want to donate, please let me know. Certainly, money donations will help them a lot also. Thanks, Lisa

* * * * * * * * * *

From Kate: My family is from St. Bernard Parish which is the city southeast of New Orleans that went totally underwater. This week has been quite exhausting for all of us. We can happily say that everyone is now accounted for!!!! But the reality that their lives will never be the same is now sinking in. My parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins are all homeless for God knows how long. They only have the clothes on their backs so obviously it will take time for them to be able to rebuild their lives. I have attached an email from my mom with some things they will need to rebuild their lives.

Walter: shirts-ex-large, pants: 38w 30 inseam (likes K-Mart), shoe size 9 extra wide, 38 briefs, x-large t shirt, sport socks, jacket

Donna: shoe 5-1/2 or 6 tennis for exercise, need socks and thick exercise socks, small tops, size 6 or 4 petite pants or jeans, loves stretch exercise shorts, size 5 underwear

Uncle Pete: large shirts, 34x30 jeans and pants, 34" boxers, socks, size 10 shoes

Meanwhile, I have been feeling incredibly blessed lately, and when I've been in trouble so many people have helped me out, so I am trying to pay it forward, so to speak. I sent Lisa some money to her Paypal account and tried to explain how she can create a button and so forth that I could put on my site for her, but I think web stuff is not really her thing. So I just said I'd post one of my own (from a memorial fund I set up a while ago) and forward her any donations.

If anyone has clothing as requested above that they'd like to donate, please contact me about sending it. (All sizes are American.)

I awoke today to NPRs coverage of the disaster(s) in New Orleans (specifically the new shoot-to-kill order regarding looters, who have been shooting at rescue helicopters and anyone in uniform). I can't believe that just a few days ago I heard the same commentators saying "The results of the storm were much less severe than first feared..."

Yesterday TheLimey was telling me what he heard on the radio regarding the cutting of levee funds prior to this (funds diverted to Iraq, I've heard rumored?). I have found a lot of references to this in the blogosphere, but if someone can find an official source let me know, because I want to read it for myself now and see what's what.

I also want to see that book predicting exactly this disaster, whose author was featured on an interview on NPR yesterday.

Dangit! Why wasn't I listening to the radio yesterday?

I wish I knew what was going on with Flickr and the magical disappearing images. Not all have gone--it's mostly those on this page. There are some sporadically missing ones from other pages interspersed with ones that are still there. I have no idea if it has something to do with my suddenly wildly popular new image or if that's a coincidence.

Anyone else use Flickr and have a similar problem?

Finders, Looters

Finders, Looters
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

A former student from the prejudice class I taught last year sent me this set of links, (included below). I combined the photos into one jpg for easier comparison (click to enlarge).

Amazingly blatant!


***********************

White people "find" things...

news.yahoo.com/photo/050830/photos_ts_afp/050830071810_sh...

Black people "loot" things

news.yahoo.com/photo/050830/480/ladm10208301530

***********************

One of the recipients of the group email responded humorously by saying "We're born evil, we can't help it. Why, just earlier today,
I caught myself looting some water out of the business school drinking fountain…"

Really, it's laugh about it or cry about it.

Oh cr**, what did we just do?!?

Oh crap, what did we just do?!?
Originally uploaded by Melanie and Co..

Another set of photos by another friend. (Beginning with an especially funny one--I think we were actually talking about the wind).

Thelimey & Doctorlizardo

Liz and Simon
Originally uploaded by argotnaut.

There--now you can see our "catalog" photo. What we're advertising I'm not sure.

(Photo courtesy of Argotnaut.)

As for once I could not be the one compulsively wielding the camera, I am depending on the wedding photos of others. Like Argot, for now.

Despite a number of last-minute and midnight disasters including multiple automobile breakdowns, cake collapsages, and disappearing volunteers, this turned out to be a smashing success. Possibly the best wedding and reception ever. Lots and lots of people took photos, so--more later. Probably quite a bit later. For now, back to the honeymoon.

Finally finished that report and gave the client his feedback about the results and my recommendations. Now I just have to deliver the written report to the office on campus that helps students with disabilities. (Campus mail takes DAYS so I hand-deliver them.)

Started the day weeping on the phone to TheLimey (in Florida) about how freakin' overwhelmed I am with work, moving, wedding details. If only just one of those things wasn't going on! I seem to be getting a sore throat and cough, too. Must find time to rest properly, or I am going to be miserably sick for my wedding and honeymoon, thus trumping anything anyone else could possibly do to "ruin" it. (Yes, you know who you are--all of you!)

Have just realized that a number of the last-minute desperate items I have recently ordered to be delivered to my new address (so I for sure get them) are completely inaccessible to me. This is because I still don't have my own key to the mailbox, and TheLimey is in another state until Thursday. With the only key.

Dangit!! Horribly inconvenient and frustrating.

I can even see that there is something already in the package box.

Can't play as much bloggie as usual.

Still moving, and have a big WAIS-MMPI client report I'm supposed to be writing over the weekend. Actually, I'm kind of panicking, because this kind of report is likely to take 10 or so hours to write; it's already 8pm on Sunday, and my office and reference stuff still isn't set up or even unpacked.

I have been trying to get assessment clients all summer, and naturally they show up only during the last two weeks before the wedding, which is conveniently also exactly when I'm moving.

Also in the "highly convenient" category is that TheLimey is having to spend these same two weeks in Florida for work, though he managed to get away and fly back here for Saturday and part of today (the morning part). This means that while we both have a ton of work to do, the two additional things (wedding preparations and moving all my stuff to his place) are going to be a lot harder for him to participate in. Are being a lot harder for him to participate in. Although being a hard-working and reliable sort of bloke, he's done all he can when here.

Kind of a flood of carp for both of us. And by carp, I mean another word that has mostly the same letters, but is a lot less fun to find in your local river.

I need to see more details about this research before I'm going to accept that whatever's being produced is in fact "high-quality industrial steel".

"Boffins".

Hee!

In completely insignificant news, I found that whatbadgerseat.com really exists. I love the Simpsons.

In more significant news, I discovered that the salary I thought psychologists make was a little low, at least for this area. I guess TheLimey was not just making up encouragements, but actually may have a chance at being a stay-at-home dad! To see what I would make if I lived by you, enter your zip code here.

Unbelievable, but I think I am over the pain of the past two presidential elections. Over in the sense that I am ready to look ahead and start fighting again. It can't happen a freakin' third time, can it? Please god.

I do think a "Jeb vs. Hillary" race would make a good flick.

Native English (?) Speakers

Communication
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

Not pictured is how TheLimey subsequently began calling the item in question a "swimming suit" rather than a "swim suit".

This made me imagine that one would have to take care to keep it away from water when not being worn, as it might well swim off under its own steam!

If global warming is outlawed, only outlaws will warm their globes.

Tiny Door in Ann Arbor

Tiny Door
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

There were small gifts laid on the doorstep, including a "haycorn" and a maple sugar candy.

On the Ypsi Bridge

On the Ypsi Bridge
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

I haven't seen Maggie since 20 years ago, when we were both exchange students to the same island in Norway.

We haven't been able to find the others yet, despite the internet.

Ice Cream

Ice Cream
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

The best photo of the bunch. Hee.

I knew Julian had a cold, but it was worth the risk.

Fun in the park.

Ypsilanti Park
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

I am getting old, because my muscles were quite sore the next day.

Ypsilanti Beer Festival

Ypsilanti Beer Festival
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

The "before" picture: waiting in the appropriate line, of course.












I am surprised by how few photos of this great cultural event have been uploaded to Flick'r. (Most of them by me or Melanie.)

Saw a wild turkey in a tree and a lizard by the side of the road when driving to TheLimey's on Sunday. I bet if I had been walking, they would have heard me galumphing along and run off before I arrived. So much for not seeing things while driving! I have also greatly appreciated the sinful, sinful air conditioning during this incredible heat wave.

Did a massive number of things over the weekend: saw a friend I haven't seen in 20 years, attended the Ypsilanti Beer Festival, moved more boxes of stuff, etc. I have a lot of photos but haven't really been online much in order to post them. The neighbors' internet has been mostly gone for the past couple weeks so I've done very little spontaneous posting.

In the course of only two or three days, the wedding has gone from being three months away to just over three weeks away. it was very sudden. People are just now beginning to call me about the travel/lodging arrangements that I've been urging them to make for months now, of course, which makes me feel panicky (or at least anxious if you want to stick to diagnostic definitions).

The official RSVP list is up to nearly 90, and the probable count is closer to about 175. Most of my colleagues who are coming haven't officially RSVPed, although a couple people have told me they won't be able to make it. I didn't choose the same weekend as the annual APA convention on purpose, but that's how it turned out.

After three years of car-free bliss/nightmare, I am no longer sans car. As I will be moving to TheLimey's slightly removed home next month, I will have to actually drive to my academic and clinical duties instead of walking.

Pros of car-free: no car-buying; no insurance & maintenance etc.; someone else drives while you sit on the bus reading; no parking problems; a feeling of smug self-righteousness about pollution and roadkill; lower expectations of others about social life; less road rage (I don't say "no road rage" because I still become quite cross at careless drivers even as a pedestrian); smelling all the seasons; seeing many small things daily that simply are not visible from a car; no concern with running over squirrels; not having personal identity invested in what metal box you're currently occupying; fewer concerns about oil and its whimsical pricing.

Cons of car-free: bad public transport that goes almost nowhere on the weekends and stops early at night; smelly and/or intrusive fellow passengers; dragging six heavy bags of groceries home in a flimsy wheeled cart; people treat you like you're a teenager even if you're nearly forty; the months of February and March; broken capillaries on my cheeks each winter; nonstop asthma in cold weather; having to be ferried about by others or else left behind; always being at the mercy of when others want to go to and leave the party; not being able to go fetch UPS and FedEx packages that require a signature; not buying wine, birdseed, canned soup, or fresh vegetables because they're a pain in the behind to get home.


The "new" car is a 1994 Chevrolet Cavalier sedan, which basically has all the opposite qualities from those I have assembled over the years as what I want in a vehicle. (Including its automatic transmission.) However, as it had extraordinarily low miles for its age and was a very low price, I really couldn't find a way to rationalize not buying it. Even though online reviews dubbed it the Big Mac of automobiles. Not so much for its size, which is pretty small, but for its bland popularity.

Its color is turquoise, or teal, or even dark aqua. I know that "tealmobile" sounds better phonetically, but I like "aquamobile" better, as it then sounds submersible.

The old (?) adage "Driving an automatic is like having someone else shift for you--poorly" does hold true, but I will simply have to rein in my impulses towards jackrabbit starts at red lights. While I seem able to drive an automatic okay for the most part, I still find myself occasionally hitting the brake by way of automatically seeking out the clutch. Especially in an emergency situation.

For example--just hypothetically speaking--if I were to need to turn around quickly in someone's driveway in order to go back and pluck, say, a small turtle off a hot country road, I might brake while trying to clutch.

The hypothetical turtle would then make small furious hissing sounds from the recesses of its shell when I picked it up off the road as SUVs whizzed past.

Hypothetically.

Dangit Blogger,

Why is it that you publish my posts 4 or 5 times when I only want one post, and then when I try to get rid of the redundant ones, you get rid of all of them? Whywhywhy?

I want to be gruntled!


PS: The famous Ypsilanti Beer Festival is Saturday at the park near my house. Weehaw!

Lisa and Liz

Lisa and Liz
Originally uploaded by Melanie and Co..

Of all the photos I took last night, here is one taken by someone else.

There was a little get-together at a nearby pub for another of our cohort who just got engaged. (Not pictured here.)

I was definitely happy to get out of the house and see some familiar people, and run around in the rain with them.

Some of them.

Okay, only one other person was nuts enough to go out in the downpour and prance around with me. (Not pictured here.)

Have added a new link to my blogroll; partly because who can resist the words "carbon" and "geek" in close proximity?, and partly because of his Bob Geldof/Gollum discovery.


Oh yeah; he also has a robots section.

Spent the weekend trying to work, and even working some.

I spent last summer agonizing over my thesis for hours each day in a 95-degree apartment while construction crews rebuilt the street in front of my building from sunup to sundown while experiencing terrible asthma*. So this year is definitely an improvement.

Instead of my thesis, I'm working on research publications of my own. Instead of construction workers, I have ants swarming throughout my apartment that have suddenly taken to biting me after four years of peaceful coexistence. Instead of terrible asthma, I have much-improved asthma and really, really terrible eye allergies 24-7. (I'm thinking maybe it's actually pinkeye. Or eyeball-eating bacteria.) Have also had unbelievably terrible cabin fever due to the isolation.

Thank goodness for the improved asthma and the lack of the giant street-stomper machine!

Awoke two hours later than usual with a hangover. Headachey, groggy, nauseated, dehydrated...only--wait a minute, I haven't had so much as a glass of beer with dinner in about two weeks! All I did last night was stay up until midnight redoing the regression tables in my results section. Maybe this is that "getting old" thing I've been hearing so much about.

Today I met with the advisor I have over the summer. I told him that as much as I claim to like writing, I sure am finding this process agonizing, even when I know what I want to say. He assured me that was normal.

Still, it seems that there must be some better way. I know people typically find themselves feeling "unmotivated" and they get stuck because of that. However, I have been feeling motivated, yet I still feel stuck. (Motivation is not all it's cracked up to be.) It's something else that is making this agonizing. It feels like when you're learning the tasks at a new job, or first speaking a foreign language, or ... some other activity where you have to feel your way through algorithmically, step by step, because it's not yet intuitive.

I have had flashes of that feeling of "flow" (you remember your basic Csikszsentmihalyi, right?) while doing research and research writing; there must be people who feel like that a lot of the time. I want to be one of them!



*Me, not the construction crew. In fact, scratch that whole sentence. Replace with this one: "I spent last summer agonizing over my thesis for hours each day in a 95-degree apartment while experiencing terrible asthma as construction crews rebuilt the street in front of my building from sunup to sundown ."

As I continue to throw out and clean up my possessions, I have been scanning a few things that don't need to be kept in hard copy form, for example: the notes I took at the lecture of Dr. England about Mars and space travel. (I may have been the only person in the audience scribbling madly the entire time.)

So here it is in PDF form, with no accompanying clarifications. Therefore I will be happy to answer any questions you may have. (No, I just mean about the notes!)

After getting home from the anxiety clinic last night, I finally got to do some art work for the first time in about 4 years. Of course, it's just logos and T-shirts for the AWP conference, but still I'm pleased. I ended up staying up until 2am working on it, since I have other tasks scheduled for today. (For me, that's really really late.)

I was asked to design the T-shirt for the Women of Color Caucus, but I went a step further and took the overall AWP design and redid that, too. I hope we end up using them both, as it/they look a lot better than the original B/W sketch. IMHO.

I posted the designs on Flickr and the description of the whole process on my Prog Blog.

I guess I should also post the original design just so people understand what the heck I'm talking about.

[Can't ... stop ... posting!]

From TopFive email today:


The Top 5 Things You Don't Want to Hear From Tech Support:

5. "I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."
4. "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
3. "Hold on a second ... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
2. "Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics."

and TopFive.com's Number 1 Thing You Don't Want to Hear From Tech Support...

1. "Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."

Ever since the taking-classes bit of my degree finished (about two years ago now that I think about it--no, wait--is just one year? just seems like two, I guess) I've had these odd patches of loneliness.

When I was taking classes with my cohort of 8, we all saw each other a certain number of times a week, chatted regularly, etc. But now we only see each other in passing here and there, or if someone makes an effort to create some kind of social event.

I'm too busy for these damn events, I tell you. Plus people seem to organize events that are either late at night (for me being out past 10 is late) and that I would have to find a ride to and from, or they're all-day things for which the "younger" cohorts are getting people together. Which I just don't have the time, money, or patience for right now.

Actually, I think there's a poker night at one colleague's house on Thursdays, but it involves being out late and drinking, and I'm tired enough all day lately as is. (Plus I'm horribly allergic to their cat, of course.) And I just--have little interest in learning any kind of complicated meaningless behaviors such as card playing when I'm using all my limited thinkin' power to do these research write-ups. I also have little interest in gambling in general (even a token system), and little interest in social events that are primarily competitive in nature ("let's get together and play a game!") So I end up very out of the loop.

I know, I know. I'm unnatural and wrong, but that's just the way I am. I would rather attend a free lecture on campus about space travel. Which I did. But it's not very social.

On the other hand, I get pretty squirrelly undertaking my current behavior, which is working my behind off while being at home most of the time. It's a breeding ground for neurosis, I tell you. Being around other people some of the time keeps people balanced. (That's why we try to increase the social contacts of almost any client who walks through the door of the clinic.)

And with how busy I've been, and TheLimey's been, we've only seen each other one night and one weekend in the past...what, two months? Six weeks? And we won't see each other much over the next month, either.

So here's me: I don't go to work every day and see people, and I don't see people on the weekend, my place constantly looks like a tornado hit it (with a pile of boxes)--no wonder I'm feeling unbalanced and lonely. The problem is, I'm too desperately busy trying to get all this crap done "over the summer"* to remedy that.

I'm continuing to pack my stuff and move the boxes when we do see each other, but I feel I have nearly reached the point where I either have to just move what's remaining and be done with it, or stop for now until I'm ready to actually move. Which I can't do until I have a car.

I'm also discovering it's really hard to buy a car when you don't have a car to go look for cars.

So I'm at this impasse: can't move, can't not move, can't get a car, can't continue without one, must finish academic work, but becoming very lonely and neurotic because of the solitude. Feeling very paralyzed with all these conflicting courses of action, all of which I must undertake.

(There's that verb "undertake" again, but it'll have to do.)



*"Over the summer" always sounds like a long time, but it actually ends up really being, like, six weeks or something. Summer was only really long when we were kids, but by saying that phrase still makes it sound like it's a long and potentially productive time.

Squirrel Kissing

Buddy Boo Giving Kisses
Originally uploaded by KissySquirrel.

No, this is not me, but I wish it was.

Of course, squirrels make terrible house-companions because of the combination of claws and leaping onto one's head, which can't be trained out of them.


I keep telling myself that.

Guess I'm susceptible to peer pressure at a certain level after all...

You scored as Natural Causes. Your death will be by natural causes, though not by any disease, because that is another option on this test. You will probably just silently pass away in the night from old age, and people you love won't realize until the next morning, when you are all purple and cold and icky. So be happy, you won't be murdered. Natural Causes 73% Disappear 60% Eaten 53% Cut Throat 53% Gunshot 53% Bomb 47% Poison 47% Disease 47% Stabbed 47% Suicide 40% Accident 33% Suffocated 27% Drowning 20% How Will You Die?? created with QuizFarm.com

...Nice to know! Considering my goal of living to be 100. A moving goal, as now I want to live past 100. Maybe to 120.

The Button

The Button
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

I don't know what this anonymous button was for, but I sure as heck wanted to push it.

TheLimey has suggested that it begs for a story/stories to be written about it.

So, whaddaya got?

So, I'm finally infamous, but unfortunately not for any of the interesting bad things I've done in my life. (Next it'll be something like being a "Glamor don't" with nylons stuck in my skirt, or getting photographed next to the governor, picking my nose.)

Serves me right for actually giving a proper attribution link to someone's work instead of wild-eyed-ly plagiarizing, huh?

If only I had known before that while my everyday writing is completely uninteresting to the public, the way I keep track of it is fun to laugh at. I could have just been doing that all along! It's a lot less work, I tell you whut.

I'm mainly just annoyed that someone assumed I was a man. Is that the default for someone writing about research?

Maybe I should have included references to progress on that pink sweater I've been knitting since last fall, or my recipe-indexing project*.

*One of those things for someday, like when I have a broken leg and can spend a few weeks at home alone with my scanner.

I was having trouble posting to my new blog yesterday, and then today the entry showed up on this one. Blogger is weird.

* * * * * * * * *

You know what's really great?

I'll be able to tell my future kids that their dad is an alien. And it will be true!

(This happened to a colleague of mine whose mom is German.)

Progress?

As you can see, at the bottom of my sidebar (on right) I have placed a progress bar like wot Tim has that he got from this Hasselhoffing guy.

Currently I'm working on writing up the results of my gender and nutrition study for submission to the research journal Appetite. (I am basing the percentage on the vague average of about 8,000 words in recently published reports.)

I have several analysis and writing projects I hope to finish this summer, so that when I apply for internships this fall I can have them on my vita as "in submission".

Actually, since I have so many balls in the air at once right now, I think I may start an entire new blog regarding my progress on various things...

Yeah, now that I think of it, it's a good idea. Then my advisor can just go look at my progress blog instead of pestering me.

I hope no one's taken "prog blog" yet, but I'm guessing they have.

.....


Okay, here it is.

Mmmmm....organizey bars.....

.....

Later:

I have removed the progress bar from this page. All progress bars are now corralled on the Prog Blog.

(I want to add a "wedding arrangements" one, but it's so difficult to quantify. )

RSVP

RSVP
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

Phantom guest brings mystery dish!

Overlooking Sheffield

IMG_0446
Originally uploaded by *Pete.

I love this photo (from someone else's Flickr album). I've had it as wallpaper for a few days.

I hope I get to see this for myself some day.

(How could you stand to leave this and move here?)

Squirrel Action Shot

Squirrel Action Shot
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

This squirrel was skittish of coming close, but was leaping from branch to branch for the peanuts I tossed up into the tree for her. I could probably have just held one up and waited patiently, but it was fun tossing them.

Here you can see her little paw sticking out to try to catch the peanut.

She would have eventually caught one, too, if some guy hadn't come over to try to "help" me, and instantly scared her off into another tree entirely.

I was very disappointed. She had been doing such great tricks, and I was about to reward her!

Then I had to pretend to listen nicely while this amateur told me in all seriousness about how campus squirrels were bored with peanuts ("they can get peanuts anytime!"), and adored cookies instead.

Which is an exactly wrong argument -- rodents generally prefer familiar food items overall, and usually take a while to cautiously acclimate to new foods. (Not to say that campus squirrels might not be used to cookies at this point.)

It's an evolutionary device meant to reduce the risk of being poisoned. Humans have it too, especially in childhood. Hence those "picky eaters".

Incredibly hot up here in my third-floor AC-free apartment. I'm not yet used to the heat this year. Even when I do get used to the heat, the way my body wants to deal with it is to lie about like a melty blob rather than working. Shoot. 'Cause I got a lot of work to do.

The weather and early light is also influencing my waking up around 5:30 these days. I like that, especially when it's full light so early. (I observed the solstice by watching and appreciating both the sunrise and the sunset.) The only problem is that I'm very hot and tired by noon-ish.

However, the very early part of the morning is lovely and begs to be enjoyed outdoors.

I have managed to increase my jogging distance to three-quarters of a mile. You fit types may well laugh, but this is a big deal for me: a person with exercise-induced asthma and raised primarily to sit inside and read books. It wasn't too long ago that I could barely go an eighth of a mile. Now it's six times that! [Pats self on back]

Not only can I go farther now, but it seems that the increase has been going a lot faster lately, like I got past some kind of exercise hump. Something feels different and less torturous about it suddenly. I think that the increase to two miles will be a lot quicker than the increase to one mile was. (Or--I guess--is, as I am technically still at three-quarters. But I anticipate doing a full mile very soon.)

If I can get up to five miles at some point, perhaps I will join the notorious Hash House Harriers, a self-described "drinking club with a running problem". They're also known as the "lunatic fringe of running", and were (of course) originally started by some bored expatriate Brits in Malaysia, but are now international. An athletic friend of mine has been entertaining me with her experiences with them during the past few years.

However, for now, I think just the jogging itself is enough of a challenge. Chasing someone pretending to be a rabbit cross-country can be distant a fantasy for now.

Last night, while the world of all my desperate to-dos continued to crash down around me, I went to Chuck E. Cheese.

This was really because one of my colleagues threw a surprise birthday party for his wife there.

As it was my first time at a Chuck E. Cheese, I took full advantage of the entertainment possibilities. Along with several others, I played air hockey, but on my knees since it was really really tiny. I also tried skee-ball, which was slightly harder but also very small in scale. My favorite, however, was the game in which I had to punch some buttons to get little plastic balls to jump into the mouth of a big plastic frog.

I also tried some of the rides:




...and after spending the evening envying the children their gerbil-tube hanging from the ceiling, I finally snuck into it via the exit slide once the employees had closed it down. I think they preferred not to notice, as there are cameras everywhere in that joint.




It turns out that crawling around in plastic tubes is very hard on the knees. We must all have had much chubbier knees as children.

Info Not Got

Info Not Got
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

Received this message trying to upload something to Flickr.

Very descriptive.

Peanut!

Peanut!
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

A sorely needed squirrel break today.

They probably thought, "A sorely needed peanut break today".

There are some cute hand-wrestling photos in this set. Their little paws were warm on my air-conditioner-chilled hands.

Industrial wasteland and hunk

Handsome bloke
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

We went for a walk around Ypsi Saturday and saw several houses, streets, and neighborhoods that we both liked.

This particular shot was in the kind of deserted industrial area I always want to picnic in.

Unfortunately, we found a yard sale with an extraordinary selection of really cool books. For very cheap.

This is unfortunate because I am trying to pack/ move/ sell/ throw out my possessions, not acquire more.

I don't know how much more the shelves can take!

I was recently at a baby shower for my advisor, where I was conversing with a certain author whom I've met a few times around campus. (Exceptionally nice lady, BTW.)

Her advice about publishing (although I want you to know it was unsolicited, since I was honestly not trying to snark writing tips from the token author) was that fiction really doesn't sell. Non-fiction does.

Therefore, one should start with writing non-fiction, and then you can branch out into fiction once you're already published. (It seemed to make sense, when I thought about, for example, Michael Crichton, who knows how to write medical matters in a way that laymen understand.)

I asked, "So, is that how you did it? Did you start with non-fiction?" Sheepishly, she admitted that she had actually started right in with fiction, although she attributed her initial "break" to the luck of being in the right place at the right time.

Singing

Singing
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

The title is pretty self-explanatory, really...this is at that wedding.

Laughing

Laughing
Originally uploaded by doctorlizardo.

We were laughing with you, not at you. I swear.

Dumb but made me laugh:

Snakes are God's way of saying:

"Hey, look! A snake!"