Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Good things about taking steroids:

-Reduced inflammation of everything, whether targeted components (lungs, joints, etc.) or not. As a result, skin looks ivory instead of pale and blotchy. Also less baggage around eyes.
-Sense of well-being and optimism. This seems weird, but is always true for me. Only partly related to feeling able to breathe again.
-Huge, ripped delts and quads! (Okay, maybe not in the 5 days it takes for my lung tissue to de-inflame.)

Bad things about taking steroids:

-Hoarseness. Not such a big deal now, but definitely was a big deal when I was still recording.
-Reduced appetite. I'm trying to gain weight, here, pal, not lose more!
-Increased impatience. I think I even experienced 'roid rage towards some tangled hangers* on Sunday.
-How could I forget the thing where I think I smell like a goat? I forgot it, because it doesn't seem to have happened this time. I wonder why not?
-All kinds of terrible long-term effects if taken for very long. Infections, flesh-eating viruses, brain lobe slippage, irreversible memory loss, voting "red", and I don't know what all.

*Note to self: name next band** "Tangled Hangers".

**Further note to self: go up against TheLimey's putative band, "Suckling Pig" and beat them ... somehow... at something [editor's note: sorry, don't mind her. Must be the steroids talking.]


Big Al said...

If it's flesh-eating viruses you're after, you can do it without steroids. Just book yourself into any UK hospital.

(I am well outside of punching distance, and therefore feel quite safe to make flippant remarks such as the one above).

liz said...

Yes, nothing like a good staph meeting. [groan]

argotnaut said...

Hm -- steroids don't help my skin; they just make it dry and greasy at the same time. And I did notice right away that they make me smell like a boy. Some EMT who was transporting Frinkenstein to an appointment laughed when I told her that.