Saturday, July 01, 2006

In the Spirit of Things

I'm sure this episode has lately come back to haunt others as well as me:

A man in a cowboy hat barbeques a soccer ball and thrusts it, skewered and flaming, at the camera, screaming, "Open wide for some soccer!" As the commercial continues, high-action footage of soccer matches accompany the announcer's voice.

TV Announcer: The Continental Soccer Association is coming to Springfield! It's all here--fast-kicking, low scoring, and ties? You bet!

Bart: Hey, Dad, how come you've never taken us to see a soccer game?

Homer: I...don't know.

TV Announcer: You'll see all your favorite soccer stars. Like Ariaga! Ariaga II! Bariaga! Aruglia! And Pizzoza!

Homer: Oh, I never heard of those people.

TV Announcer: And they'll all be signing autographs!

Homer: Woo-hoo!

TV Announcer: This match will determine once and for all which nation is the greatest on earth: Mexico or Portugal!

Now just go here to get your own genuine football name shirt, like wot I did..


Andrew said...

My condolences on England's defeat today. I hope the little critter didn't "Bend Your Uterus Like Beckham" as the Limey screamed at his inept side. Because my ancestry is 3/4 German and 1/4 UK, my rooting order for the World Cup has been 1) U.S., 2) Germany, 3) England, and 4) Netherlands, since we'll probably be moving there in the next year or two. Germany is still standing, but now the diffulty will be finding someplace that's open on July 4 so I can watch the match.

liz said...

Oh, that's true--we still have those two ESPN channels, so I'll probably just set up the VCR to record it before we go for our all-day park jaunt (to beat traffic). Same place we had the reception--fireworks over the lake and all.

Won't bars be open on Independence Day? Don't people usually want to drink on the holidays even if (or especially if) they can't shop for groceries?

Andrew said...

Sports bars will likely be open, but they will probably be playing baseball. On the 4th of July! Who'da thunk it?

There's always the mighty Claudia's sports bar, where I watch the Bears games, and also the just-as-mighty Horse Brass Pub. That's probably the better bet because they play English Premier League on the week-HENDS, plus I can have the traditional English breakfast! By the way, what's with that fried toast?

Liddy said...

Ooh, I'm a fan of the Brazilname! Mine is Lio.